In the style and likeness of Steve Dalton.. I give you Brian OConnor! *can u tell which one he is?


B OConnor84: argh
B OConnor84: i hate work
B OConnor84: i really dont wanna go in
speckzz17: what do u do?
B OConnor84: shoprite
speckzz17: underwear modeling a rough business?
speckzz17: oh
speckzz17: right
B OConnor84: haha
B OConnor84: i wish!
speckzz17: just pretend ur underwear modeling
speckzz17: walk around like u are
B OConnor84: i dont have the abs for it
speckzz17: strike funny groin enhancing poses
speckzz17: oh.. well then do u have the abs for working at shoprite?
B OConnor84: yes indeed
speckzz17: cuz the two jobs require somewhat a similar physique
speckzz17: i like my foodstore men strapping
speckzz17: what time do u work today?
B OConnor84: 12
speckzz17: ohhh so ur leaving
B OConnor84: in a few
speckzz17: u im me purely to complain...not to enjoy my company
speckzz17: not for the companionship or any other form of the word
B OConnor84: lil bit of both
speckzz17: lol
speckzz17: alright
B OConnor84: im off
speckzz17: alright, hav fun modeling
B OConnor84: enjoy ur day

Good stuff, good stuff indeed. Maybe he should work at disney instead as an underwear model.. then he could wish everyone a magical day..

Speaking of supermarket men.... (which i think would be a kick ass name for a comics series) I could see it now, the customer service counter would be like batman's control panel, and the pharmacy would cook up the latest and greatest.... you open the frozen food door revealing the tv dinners and pull out the broccoli and pasta to open the secret passage to the marketmobile.... of course resembling a shopping cart. Crime?? no, we're outta that.. you'll have to take a raincheck.

So seriously speaking. What is going on? I am not the kind of person who seeks out drama. I mean not that kind. I'd shed a thousand tears to prove they all are for you. Though I know thats not necessary.. but it sounds dramatic and so I figured "so why not!?"

Let me just say how happy i am. Sure I get depressed ... often when writing here.... but in truth, this is the happiest time of my life. No, not highschool. That I never really liked. But the people Im friends with are pretty good to me. Even if im not invited.. someone will come get me, take me for ice cream, and be an overall kick ass friend. I know that the true test will be when the winter and spring breaks come along.. the true test will be whether people get back together and hang out, or whether ties come undone. I see with my older brother that he and his friends from high school visit each other at college and hang out alot, even while making new really good friends. I really really hope I can do that. And lately I've been thinking about which friends I really dont want to let go. Its easier with the people in town... katie, jamie, steve, elizabeth.. im really lucky cuz they'll be coming home to my home.. practically. But then there are the people who live outta town. And yesterday was just one of those days when I realized that people like ali g.. they dont just go away. Im certainly not going to let her. =-)

alrighty... there u go people... im in love with u guys... its cwazy.

Things u should know:

danny is the future and chicks dig it.
I am awake and not sure why.
Joshua is an east coast name too.
I still havent seen Orlando Bloom's movie.
Pirates of the Carribean is now known as "orlando bloom's movie".
I am bad for ur health

dancingChicA333: umm...
dancingChicA333: is stephen working?
speckzz17: is stephen king?
speckzz17: hehe.. sorry

that is the question...


"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint."
--Mark Twain

"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change."
--Dan Quayle

"Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis."
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"He who is in love is wise and is becoming wiser, sees newly every time he looks at the object beloved, drawing from it with his eyes and his mind those virtues which it possesses."
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

I am wise.

joe

love

i

Happy Frappy

~Not much of this makes sense to me
The river leaves run cold and dry
But it keeps me from swinging tree to tree
And sometimes I’m too scared to even try

Hashing through the possibilities
They seem as endless as the sky
You seek the truth and the quiet breeze
But the air is too thin to reply

**Well I know that’s where I’ll never be
Because I can see the summer’s done
I try to let the river flow in and out of me
And pray I float the way I think I want
And pray I float at all**

~Not much of this makes sense to me
The river leaves run cold and dry
But it keeps me from swinging tree to tree
And sometimes I’m too scared to even try

Utter confusion feigns clarity
Scattered delusions excuses destiny
It’s never exactly how it appears to be
It’s too much for any of us who even try to see

**Well I know that’s where I’ll never be
Because I can see the summer’s done
I try to let the river flow in and out of me
And pray I float the way I think I want
And pray I float at all**

--Guster

So a free moment rears its ugly head for the first time in days and so here I am. Danny is going out somewhere, so I have a few minutes to myself before mother returns with more things for me to do. Sometimes I wonder if she creates these things while I sleep, cuz I never notice them. To her credit, these things do need to get done.. later

I went yesterday to the place where "Things go to die". No, not ducks-- relationships. As fun as mini-golf is... its associated with a closure that Im not too fond of. I've gone mini golfing at all different stages of my life... I mini-golfed in 8th grade with stephen and elizabeth and a couple other people... and then with pete and katherine last summer, and then yesterday with joe. I think I even went mini-golfing with john. Im not superstitious tho. =-)

"I have often walked down this street before. But the pavement always stayed beneath my feet before, all at once am i several stories high knowing Im on the street where you live."

I was watching a comercial for "sleepless in seatle" where Rosie o'donnel tells meg ryan "you dont want to be in love, you want to be in love in a movie." Well I know what she means... sometimes I feel like I want to be in love in a musical...lol then I realize what a big dork that makes me and reality strikes me as pretty sweet.

"Bed? Bed? I couldnt go to bed, my head's too light to try and set it down. Sleep? Sleep? I couldnt sleep tonight, not for all the jewels in the crown. I could have danced all night- I could have danced all night and still have begged for more."

=-) Happy Frappy by guster is a good song... you should download it and let me know if you hate it. They are like dispatch, ya know, very rhythmic. Kool guitar solo too. I'll sing it (the guitar solo) for u if you want a taste. Its a good summer song.

I miss jim. Im pooped, mini-golf really took its toll on me. I slept well last night. =-) I like that feeling too... that feeling after the day is done that you used absolutely all of your energy and couldnt possibly have done more.

500 puzzle pieces later danny is still making fun of me. He is the future you know. He has more future ahead of him than the rest of us have. As he morbidly and smugly pointed out last night between Dave Chapel impressions. Sigh.. all these men in my life existing perhaps for the sheer joy of making fun of me.. what would I do without them?

I wish jim would come home for a little and have the guys over some night.. it'd be neat to hang out again-- joe could meet them and they could get to meet the guy that last they heard got me a lamp and a snow globe. hehe.. They were funny the night they saw me bring home the presents. I was all smiles and they were all teasing. Good stuff. Good stuff I say.

someone should call me and we should go see orlando bloom's movie.. it came out today i think...
-----------------------ooooh so continental ;-)

ahh.. whata good song

Blew Away

Blew, blew away
But I don't wanna fade
Blew, blew

And if you love her
You know it will come true
And if you need her
You know that she'll be there

Stay awake, I lie here
With her and I fall
And when I wake inside you
I know you know I'm yours

Blew, blew away
But I don't wanna fade
Blew, blew

And if you're sad, too
Until the angel sings and touches you
Don't confuse my only life

I said blew, and please don't ever leave
And I will grieve, and remember thee
Hope to meet you there

And I wanna let her know
That I won't let her go
I wanna let her know
That I love her so

I'm blew, blew, blew away
But I don't wanna--
Blew, i love you
Blew

--SP

Yeah so thats the song right now... its not the worst song i could have stuck in my head. =-)

I work alot. Tuesday will feel nice. I hope I have plans of some sort.

But I will say that all this time Im spending with my co-workers is building some relationships... I guess the way it was before can best be equated with the situation a person who commutes to college might feel. Since you dont live with the people, you miss out on the connections. And all this time in the drug shack has definitely diffused some of that commuter-angst.

if you want to hear a woman sing with real soul... and im not around =-) Try Eva Cassidy. Bonnie Rait cannot hold a candle to this woman. Sheryl Crow wouldnt even be invited to hold the door for this gal. (Cassidy isnt alive anymore, but her voice will live forever)
--somewhere over the rainbow by her is not for the weak of heart.....

How I felt at random points for random intervals today

Written off
Taken for granted
Forgotten
Talked down to
Undermined


Sloppy
Like a piece of meat
Ugly
Fat
Stupid

Hot
Cold
Untrusted/worthy
Pretty
Sexy

Tired
Excited
Happy
Nervous
Jealous

Ordinary
Bored
Unloved
Loved
Like a fool


I hope none of you looked at all of the first letters and tried to understand what it spelled... if you did then u are just like me... which means u read "wtf, tu slufs hcups then jo bull?" which is spanish of course... riiiight
---uh yeah you need to treat that malady immediately.

I like the fact that you can come back to a blog.. say the day later... and erase anything that you afterward feel was too private.... and with me I luck out-- cuz no one will read this for another day or so.

gdSJL: weriofj

i need sleep. im tired. read bill bryson's Walk in the Woods and download Cheek to Cheek *(not in that order)

whatIfIwrotemyblogwithoutputtinganyspaces....Ihaventbeensickinawhile.....blahgingsigh