hmm

hey check out my bro at http://runninonempty.blogspot.com

If man can find rich consolation, remembering his good deeds and
all he has done,
if he remembers his loyalty to others, nor abuses religion by
heartless betrayal
of friends to the anger of powerful gods,
then, my Catullus, the long years before you shall not sing in
darkness with all hope gone,
wandering, dismayed, through the ruins of love.
All the devotion that man gives to man, you have given, Catullus,
your heart and your brain flowed into a lov that was desolate, wasted,
nor can it return.
But why, why do you crucify love and yourself through the years?
Take what the gods have to offer and standing serene, rise forth as a
rock against darkening skies;
and yet you do nothing but grieve, sunken deep in your sorrow,
Catullus,
for it is hard, hard to throw aside years lived in poisonous love that
has tainsted your brain
and must end.
If this seems impossible now, you must rise
to salvation. O gods of pity and mercy, descend and witness my
sorrow, if ever
you have looked upon man in his hour of death, see me now in
despair.
Tear this loathsome disease from my brain. Look, a subtle
corruption has entered my bones,
no longer shall happiness flow through my veins like a river.
No longer I pray
that she love me again, that her body be chaste, mine forever.
Cleanse my sould of this sickness of love, give me power to rise,
resurrected, to thrust love aside,
I have given my heart to the gods, O hear me, omnipotent heaven,
and ease me of love and its pain.

-Catullus

ah, to love so well, to hurt so deeply.
ah, to say both feelings in one breath.. isnt that how it goes.

yep

"Until the Real Thing Comes Along"
Writer(s): Cahn/Chaplin/Freeman/Holiner

Don't you know I'd work for you, I'd slave for you
Be a beggar or a knave for you
If that isn't love it will have to do
Until the real thing comes along

Gladly move the earth for you
Prove my love dear, and it's worth for you
If that isn't love it'll have to do
Until the real thing comes along

With all the words dear at my command
I just can't make you understand
I'll always love you baby - come what may
My heart is yours - what more can I say

I would cry for you, even sigh for you
Tear those stars down from the sky for you
If that isn't love it'll have to do
Until the real thing comes along

Walk on burning coals for you
I would drive the Chrysler,leave the Rolls for you
If that ain't love it will have to do
Until the real thing comes along

I would try to hit high "C" for you
I'd even punch out Mr. T for you
If that ain't love it will have to do
Until the real thing comes along

I would rob, steal, beg, borrow, and lie for you
Lay my little body down and die for you
(If that ain't love - if that isn't love)
If that ain't love it will have to do
Until the real thing comes along

i had dinner with my dad tonight.. he asked me if i wanted to go with him and the boyscouts this saturday on a Klondike expedition up at KMSR. Now, I dont have any plans for the day right now, and I have until friday night to tell him yay or nay.. so I have to give it some thought. Here are the particulars as I understand them:

1- it will be a very cold day
2- it will be a very early morning
3- it will last till 6 in the evening most likely
4- it will be a very cold day

So yeah, I have to give it some thought.. it is not how i want to spend my saturday, but i do miss my dad so Im not deciding yet.

I had rehearsal today.. lots and lots of harmonizing.. its not easy work. But I really want to prove to him, and to me that he wasnt wrong to pick me.

hmm

sometimes the biggest most complicated wonders of my life say themselves out loud at the oddest times..

"you say you want a revolution
well you know
we all want to change the world
(dum do be dum dum- dum do be dum dum)"

Innocent

Johnny wishes he was famous
Spends his time alone in the basement
With Lennon and Cobain
A guitar and a stereo

While he wishes he could escape this
It all seems so contagious
Not to be yourself and faceless
And a song that has no soul

I remember feeling low
I remember losing hope
I remember all the feelings and the day they stopped

We are, we are all innocent
We are all innocent
We are, we are...

Tina's losing faith in what she knows
Hates her music, hates all of her clothes
Thinks of surgery and a new nose
Every calorie is a war
While she wishes she was a dancer
And that she’d never heard of cancer
She wishes God would give her some answers
And make her feel beautiful

One day, you’ll have to let it go
You’ll have to let it go
No...
One day, you’ll stand up on your own
You’ll stand up on your own

We are (one day), we are all innocent
We are all innocent (you’ll have to let it go)
We are, we are all innocent (you’ll stand up on your own..)

We are, we are all innocent --


I had a nightmare last night about my mom killing my brothers and then going after me. It was really weird, and I dont feel rested at all.

I've had "true love waits" stuck in my head all day.. which is a really kool but really creepy song to be humming. And i dont really understand all the lyrics.. so that made it even weirder.

Ok so the day has been funky.. i understand that.. mondays are that way.. but whoa its like everyone is in a daze. I didnt see elizabeth all day, and it just seemed like i was running late for everything. I wish everyone would just tell me whats wrong and stop making me guess.. my friends like to keep me guessin.. my friends my friends