i love good company. Perhaps the most important thing in the world is having someone else to share it with. Knowing someone in a way that no one else does. Knowing them as you do. And to be known by someone else, in a way you'll never understand completely. The beauty of language is that it fails us when we need it to. When we foolishly attempt to capture the unspeakable with an utterance, the undescribable vainly shot at with adjectives that do nothing but further abstract us from the Truth of it all. And yet, god bless. I would not want to be able to explain an "i love you" in such a way as it was completely understood. I'd be afraid I was mistaken; I would be often mistaken. Words are so temporary. So misunderstood. Pharmakon.

sometimes i wonder if all im doing is playing with shadows

I'm alone right now. I like it. I thought "oh you should go see X, you havent in a while and who knows when you'll get the chance". But I'd really rather be alone. This from the girl who loves good company. Complication. Contradiction. No, I'm not feeling clever-- I'm impressed not with myself, but with all the richness of feeling that there is to be felt. Do I like to contradict? Yes without much doubt. Would I like to think myself complicated? Oh certainly I am so vain. Does it matter? I don't think so.

I wrote two very good papers this week. I can be proud of that. I'd like to get my professors' feedback-- they are my two favorite professors this semester, and certainly rank highly in general-- but Im already happy with them. They make me wonder if maybe I should be looking at studying gender in literature or religion. Both important aspects of society, and both items I don't really know what to make of. Though i try not to let on.

I will give you my world if you think you might be interested