i left in the middle of the night so of course I'm here. No where else to really go that won't remind me of what I just left, so I might as well sit here and dwell for the moment. God knows I'd only be keeping people up if I mentioned it to anyone else.

I'm angry. It's the lingering kind of sad angry that you get when one of your friends isn't acting right. Or maybe they are acting right, they just aren't really your friend. either way, that's how I feel and its nice and crappy.

Mind you I don't really want to be here right now, I'd rather be where I just left- but that's done now. Plus I need to think about this and if I was there I'd just want to talk about it and just like I said earlier, keeping other people awake hasn't been the most constructive plan of action I've ever implemented.

today did not go well.
i put too much pressure on him.
what a mess this turned out to be.


i need to sleep, but i just want to cry.